On this episode of “What is this world coming to?”, a Japanese man known only as Toco is facing an unrelatable and unique crisis of the furry kind. Why? Because Toco is the internet’s favourite human-collie hybrid
Toco spent a staggering £12,000 (almost R300,000) for a hyper-realistic border collie costume and launched a full-blown “human zoo” - only to find out that it's perhaps not everyone's cup of tea.
The TocoToco Zoo, initially wagged its way into success. Enthusiasts could book 180-minute sessions dressed as an Alaskan Malamute (for the low, low price of £256 (R6300), frolic in a dog pen, and live out their best lives, with a dash of paw Patrol.
However, the business is not as popular as it used to be, for reasons unknown. The novelty might have worn off or people just decided cats are better.
Now, Toco is sounding the alarm as he reveals that, come June, the zoo might shut its doors due to a total lack of bookings.
.“If you are having trouble, please make the reservation!” he pleaded on X (formerly Twitter), channeling both urgency and customer service desperation. In a follow-up post, he announced May 4 is still wide open, as zero people have signed up to pretend to be a dog that day.
The internet-famous fursona (geddit, persona with fur) originally rocketed to stardom via YouTube, where 73,000 subscribers tune in to watch him play fetch, perform tricks, and wear a dog suit. But as every internet sensation learn, viral fame has its limits.
Once a place where dreams of barking, butt-sniffing, and shedding could come true, it’s now dangerously close to becoming just a man in a $16K costume wandering an empty lot in Saitama.
Still, Toco remains optimistic. “If you are thinking about trying it out, please make a reservation!” he wrote on social media.
For now, the human zoo still accepts only cash. Future plans (if the gig stays open) may include accepting digital payments or introducing other animal suits.
So if you’ve ever dreamed of living as a dog — not metaphorically, but quite literally — and you’ve got a wad of yen burning a hole in your pocket and have the time and leave days to go to Japan, now’s the time.
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